Hello and welcome to your penultimate Bev’s Hills of the term!
What do you call a midget fortune teller who just escaped from prison?
A small medium at large!
Credit to Hadrian Barnes for that one, who said Assistant Dean’s can’t be funny?
This Thursday Wk.9 sees Furness launch their new international nights! This week it’s Spanish Night! We will have Spanish drinks on offer, authentic Spanish tapas, a dance performance and some more Mediterranean themed fun and games!
Your new officers
I’m sure your all delighted that campaigning is over and your new full time officers have been elected! Your Full Time Officer Team for next year is: President – Joel Pullan, VP Activities – Emily Pollitt, VP Campaigns & Communications – Rachel Harvey, VP Education – Joe O’Neill, VP Union Development – Laurence Pullan, VP Welfare & Community – Tom Fox, NUS Delegates – Laurence Pullan, Charlie Edwards, Michael Palmer.
And of course your brand new Furness Equal Opportunities Office, Ellen Hedley! Thanks again to Linus Yau for the great work he did as your co-opt officer!
The furst after the first furst
Not long until your second installment of editorial excellence! Want to contribute? We need your stories, articles, photos, ramblings or anything really, it’s YOUR college magazine.
Ex-publicity officer and aspiring sports writer Craig Kitch brings you the following match report:
Both sides walked out on to the churned up quagmire, they call the college football pitches, understanding that the winner of the game would be in pole position to go on and clinch the title. The first half was a gritty affair in which Pendle, with the wind behind them, repeatedly launched dangerous balls into the area to no avail. The imperious Jake Horsley and the curvaceous Dean Kay dominated in the air, refusing to fold under pressure. In the second half Furness increasingly dictated the game with a tasty chance falling to Adam Williams who put the ball just wide of the post. Then disaster struck, a cross by a Pendle winger trickling awkwardly across the face of the goal to be tapped in past Thomas ‘Wozza and Walka’ Warren. Angered by the goal conceded, Furness stepped up a gear and began bombarding Pendle with dangerous balls. A series of classy corners by Chris Kitch, struck cleanly with a cheeky inward swerve, ended with Adam Williams and Paul Cudihee, with an elbow then a chest, putting Furness 2-1 up. Grit, Determination and a series of classy corners leave Furness with 13 points from 6 games. If Furness win their two remaining fixtures against Graduate and Fylde there is a good chance they could win the league. #MAKINGHISTORY
A match report for the A’s and a Patriot’s round up will be in Furst Wk.10!
Holi is a religious festival celebrated by Hindus as a festival of colours. The Holi Colors Play event will start at 2 pm on the 17th March! Make sure if you buy the tickets, you are there on time because if you are late we can’t guarantee that colors will be left for you. It would be followed by Indian Buffet Lunch. The Ticket sale will be on first come,first serve basis. Only a limited number of tickets would be sold.
To buy tickets for the event, Contact Lancaster University Indian Society or your JCR International Officer, Diego!
Red Nose Day
Thursday 14th March, Furness College and FHM will be selling cakes in the Foyer from 10.00am until 11.30 with all contributions going to Red Nose Day. Please come along and buy a cake, and if you would like to get your aprons on and provide a cake or cakes for us to sell, that would be great. Any cake contributions will need to be brought to Bev Whitaker’s office by 9.30 on Thursday 14th.
Another great turn-out last week, with 8 teams entering the quiz. Once again it was “Listen to Man Feelings Every Friday From 4PM on Bailrigg FM” who won the quiz, and the grand prize NERF blasters! Make sure you’re down agin this week – Sunday Half 7, Trev.
Reginald Popoola – Male education and welfare (condom fairy) – Monday 1-2
Marguerite Walley – Female education and welfare – Thursday 1-2
Gosia Felisiak – Vice President – Tuesday 10-11 and Thursday 3-4
Diego Ortiz – Equal Oppurtunities – Monday 12-1
Ellen Hedley – Your BRAND NEW Equal Oppurtunities – Wednesday 3-4
Only a short one this week, if you’re ill like everyone seems to be at the moment then get well soon, and good luck with your deadlines, less than 2 weeks until Easter.